Culture Shock, Culture Fatigue

When I think of "culture shock" I think of something big, shocking, like being totally surprised by the new culture you are in. When people ask me how the culture shock is, I say I'm not sure I'm feeling much. We read so much about Finnish culture ahead of time that the differences we are experiencing aren't that much of a surprise.

Instead of culture shock, I think I am experiencing culture fatigue. Living in a place where every little thing is different is exhausting. Some of it is culture, language and food differences. The lack of facial expressions makes me feel invisible. The language is ridiculously hard and although I am starting to catch some things in class, in real life people still talk too fast for me so most interactions come with the need to ask "do you speak English?." And then I feel like an American cultural imperialist who couldn't bother to learn any other languages. OK, that's an exaggeration, but there is some of that there. Does the fact that I could say most of what I need to say in German buy me an indulgence?

We are still foraging for familiar foods. I found dried beans this week, lentils, garbanzos and more. They are really expensive but the bean soup now cooking on the stove smells and tastes really good. It will be worth it. Yogurt, have I told you, is pourable? And it comes in 1 liter containers which is just too small for our family. We use two or three of them a week. Butter doesn't come in quarters with tablespoons conveniently marked, you have to weigh it.
Grocery shopping on foot must be done at least 4 times per week, so far. Sometimes more. One person can only carry so much.

Some of it is the apartment (dorm-quality couch and no dryer for example, but onoone has dryers. Finns just don't do dryers). There is no microwave and no toaster. We are surviving just fine without these things, but it is one more adjustment. Also, the apartment came with enough dishes only for 5 people. Dishes must be washed after every meal or there is nothing left on which to eat the next meal. We are having Kalee's school friend and her family over this afternoon for "tea." That is 7 people, total, so on Thursday I went to the resale shop and bought more dishes and silverware, and a little tea pot. Then we realized we don't have 7 chairs, so the kids will have their tea in the kitchen and grown up in the living room. For people like us who love to cook for our friends, this really cramps our style.

And there are transportation differences. Taking the bus and walking is different (for Kalee and I) because it takes so much time and means we have to actually dress for the weather. On the plus side, Kalee is becoming a great walker. A week ago she finally stopped complaining about walking and being tired. She started asking nicely (instead of whine-l-ly) for a push up the hill. And one day when we missed the most convenient bus home and had to walk 6 blocks to the next bus stop she didn't complain at all (she did ask how much further, several times, but she didn't complain about it). I was so proud of her.

Do I sound whiny myself? It's been that kind of a week. But there are lots of really positive differences, too.

• Finns make you pay 20 or 30 euro cents for every plastic bag you use. Guess what? Almost everyone brings their own bags!
• The hot water in the shower and sink is instant. No waiting, no wasting water, no running out of hot water after everyone else in the building has showered. They are engineering miracle workers.
• The city plows all the sidewalks and walking paths and then spreads gravel for traction. Yes, gravel. Serious snow requires serious measures. And it really works.
• Great bus routs. On time and frequent, warm and comfy. Though it is expensive, about 2 euros a ride or 60 euros for 30-day unlimited pass. I guess that's how they fund it. Still cheaper than a car.
  
• Sales people in stores leave you alone. They figure you will ask for help if you need it.
  
• Duvets. We really like a nice duvet on a nice firm bed.
• The cleaning lady who cleans the apartment and changes our linens (and duvets) every other Tuesday.
• Spoon-able honey (hunaja). A satisfying little tub from which you spoon it into your tea or spread it with a knife on your bread. We all know it's going to get thick like this anyway. Why pretend it's meant to be poured? It has a distinctive taste, too, because it really is a Finnish product from Finnish flowers and bees.